-When I first became a prosecutor back in 2006, I didn't really know anything about family violence.

And it took this case that happened in 2009 in my jurisdiction to really bring it home to me how wrong I was and how misguided I was in my thoughts about family violence.

♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ Vernon is a small, rural community... ...in a county with a population of probably 14,000 on the plains of Texas.

Kind of in the middle of nowhere.

♪♪ I thought Vernon was a great place to grow up.

It's the kind of town where you just ride your bike all over the place.

You just have to be back in time for dinner.

I was born and raised here, went off to college and then went to law school, took a job in Washington, D.C., joined the Peace Corps with my wife in southern Ecuador.

And we were going to re-up for an additional year and then Meg got pregnant, which we were very excited about.

But that meant that we had to separate from the Peace Corps and move back to the United States.

What's the danger line?

-Overflowing.

-Oh.

Okay, well, they're gonna be covered by, like, an inch or two.

We moved back here to Vernon, and I started practicing law with my father, thinking that would be a temporary solution and that we would find jobs elsewhere.

Okay.

Set a timer for 15 minutes.

But it didn't work out that way, and thankfully.

That is a pressure valve.

It releases some of the pressure.

[ Air hissing ] I was elected district attorney in 2006.

I'm an elected Democrat.

There just aren't a whole lot of us out here on the plains of Texas.

Vernon's my hometown.

Almost everybody here knows me, and I know almost everybody.

I love being a rural prosecutor specifically because people have access to me and I have access to them.

These are the people that my kids are playing sports with.

It's their parents.

It's people that I'm gonna see at the grocery store.

So for me, I think it's really important that a prosecutor or any kind of leader be connected to the people that they represent.

♪♪ In 2009, a man named Tommy Castro moved to my jurisdiction with his girlfriend and two of her children.

They moved here in March.

And by July of 2009, 5-year-old Kati Earnest, his girlfriend's daughter, was dead.

She had been beaten to death.

And the unusual thing about it was that the mother, Kati's mother, gave a false confession to having committed the crime herself.

And I kind of had the mind-set that, unfortunately, a lot of people have is if she's not gonna help us, what are we gonna do about it?

Why are we gonna take this case seriously?

[ Indistinct conversations ] -Hey.

Go to the evidence room.

-In the process of investigating that case and learning about Tommy Castro's history, I saw that for years across the country, not just in Texas, he had gotten by with brutally beating, sexually assaulting, imprisoning women over and over again.

And I realized that pretty much for a couple of years as a prosecutor, I had done the same thing to other -- other abusers.

I had given them a free pass when I had a tough case and the victim didn't want to cooperate.

And at the time of this trial, I had a 5-year-old son.

My son Oliver was 5 and Kati was 5.

There was a photograph of her on her first day of pre-kindergarten.

When you see that and you have a kid that's that age, it really brings it home.

I had people say to me, "Look, you've got this confession, you need to prosecute her for this crime."

And I said, "I don't believe the confession and I can't do that."

He had so much control over her that he convinced her that she better give a confession to killing her own daughter because if she didn't, then he would either kill her other child or her.

And she felt like she had no choice.

He was just malignant.

You could hear it in the way he talked to his parents on the phone from jail.

He just attempted to manipulate them.

-You have no time remaining for this call.

Goodbye.

-I told my investigator, Jeff, that we needed to find an expert on family violence, somebody that could educate us and someone that could testify at trial and educate a jury on how it is that this man had so much power and control over Kristina Earnest.

And he reached out to First Step, which is the family violence program in Wichita Falls.

And we learned that a licensed professional counselor who has been counseling victims of domestic violence for over 20 years and who herself is a survivor of domestic violence, and she educated me on how family violence works, and she testified at trial and educated the jury as well.

-People will say, "Well, why doesn't she just leave?"

There are all kinds of reasons why she doesn't leave.

Most of the ones that I have found are very often logistical.

Because there's so much control usually involved in domestic violence, she doesn't have means.

So she doesn't have money.

She doesn't have a support system.

She's been isolated.

So leaving is a much bigger deal than just walking out the door.

-Emergency.

Can you go plug that in?

My computer went down in the middle of the start of my presentation.

Thank you.

-And welcome, Staley.

Staley is back on.

We'll be up and running here shortly.

And I'm gonna turn it over to Staley now.

-And I really apologize for being a little late.

I'm here to add input from a rural perspective, and I can't think of any better way for me to start than being in a rural area and losing Internet at the entire courthouse and having to come to my house.

And I know we have a lot of rural folks on this call, and you may never have used a domestic-violence expert before.

I absolutely encourage you.

I know it may seem daunting to find somebody that can be an expert witness for you, but it's absolutely not.

A good case on this is Dixon v. State, which is out of Houston, where a police detective who had worked a lot of family-violence cases and had received a little extra training in that subject was permitted to testify about victim behavior.

That's not ideal that you're gonna have your officer doing that, but it's a lot better than nothing when you have perhaps a victim who's gone back into a situation that you're needing to explain to the jury.

Is there a local nonprofit, nearby university professor, counselor?

Get them some additional training, which I know Carvana is involved in that kind of training, and you will have a ready-made expert that you can have on call in your jurisdiction.

-Thank you, Staley.

Alright.

Thank you all so much.

Have a wonderful rest of your week and weekends.

-Oh, Lord, have mercy.

-Did it work okay?

-[ Laughing ] Well, I mean, when I got home and got connected.

But right at 2:00.

-Yeah.

-Right when it was to start, literally, it went pfft.

-Dead.

-Dead.

♪♪ We tried some cases against defendants, got them convicted by juries, even where victims were not cooperative.

And what I learned pretty quickly is that I can convict somebody of domestic violence.

I could put them on probation.

I can send them to prison.

They can go to jail.

As soon as they get out, they're gonna commit domestic violence again.

It's just a cycle that keeps going and going.

I realized we've got to do something to help break that cycle.

And I had learned about batterers intervention and prevention programs.

Historically, prosecutors haven't thought of themselves as being involved in the role of preventing crime.

It's more addressing it, being more reactive.

But I think especially when I saw how family violence works, and how difficult those cases are, I realized that we have to play a much more proactive role in preventing crime.

So I worked with a couple of people that I go to church with and with a person here who is the executive director of the Boys and Girls Club, and we decided we were going to form this nonprofit that would operate a batterers intervention and prevention program.

[ Telephone ringing ] -Texoma Alliance to Stop Abuse.

This is Rachel.

We are located in Vernon, Texas, but I believe Amarillo does have one.

Okay, no problem.

Talk to you soon.

Alright.

Bye-bye.

What this is called is a batterers intervention prevention program, so when you're ordered to come to this class, we talk about abuse.

We will talk a lot about healthy relationships, what those look like.

You know, and definitely encouraging you to start to form healthy relationships.

-I didn't agree, you know, to signing these papers because the only reason I agreed to doing this is because I feel that I will learn how not to be abused within the class.

I don't feel like I'm the abuser in this situation, but, you know, it's not -- It's not my order.

-Right.

So on paper, your report and the court says you are, in fact, the abuser.

-Mm-hmm.

-Okay.

So that is why we're here.

You definitely have the choice to attend or not to attend, but you also will have to deal with those consequences.

-Yeah, it would argue in my favor if I did it.

-Okay, so if you'd sign there... -You know, she would tell me that I beat on her and I do all this, and that's not me.

I know that in my heart, that it's not me, so... -I did review a little bit of the abuse behavior inventory.

So I do appreciate your honesty and, you know, just putting on here which of these apply to you and how many times.

I do see where there has been some physical violence with the kicking, punching, slapping, those types of things.

I work with a lot of guys.

At some point, I have heard the majority of them say what you're telling me right now, and what I can tell you is that if you allow yourself to be open to the information, then it can be very beneficial.

-Yeah, I plan to take everything that I can, every aspect of this class that I can.

I believe it'll help me grow as an individual.

-Okay, good.

There is definitely not any harm that can be done.

I'll tell you that right now.

-Okay.

-It's something that I think will definitely be helpful.

Okay?

Nice meeting you.

-It was nice meeting you, too.

♪♪ -The research shows the batterers intervention prevention program works.

If we want to help victims in any way, this is the root of it.

It's being with the offenders, learning, you know, about their experiences, and really helping them work through their beliefs, their intentions, their actions on some of these abusive behaviors that they do, really having those honest conversations with them that maybe nobody has ever had with them before.

-Yeah.

I clean it daily, whenever I use it.

They actually just passed a law to where you can carry a knife this big.

[ Chickens clucking ] Calm down.

You're fine.

Yeah?

You're fine?

I'm not gonna hurt you.

Good.

Good.

In my previous relationship, every time we would get into an argument, she'd always storm off.

So I would end up punching stuff.

Like, I'd punch the fridge and then I would punch doors and then I'd punch walls.

I was coming home from a long day at work.

We were fighting because she didn't want to tell me what was going on with her that day, and we got into a physical altercation.

She had gotten hurt, and the cops took me to jail for domestic violence.

I thought I was only going for, like, a day or two because when my parents used to have domestic violence, they would take them for a day, let them cool down because they were drunk, and then I'd go pick them up.

I thought that's what was gonna happen.

But then I ended up staying two months.

Fighting every other day.

Like, I was just trying to sound cool in jail, you know, because I didn't want to get beat up.

I didn't get beat up at all.

Everybody that fought me lost.

That's nice.

That's where I got a lot of these.

Got a tooth mark right there, a couple of teeth right there.

But, yeah, got one right there.

That was a big one.

Cut my whole finger.

But, yeah, I'm left-handed mostly.

After two months of being there, they said I had probation, and I had to take these domestic-violence classes.

-Does anybody have any questions or anything as far as Zoom is concerned?

It's not really feasible for us to be able to meet in person at this point.

Just trying to focus the way that we would if we were in a room.

Okay, so last week, it was about respect.

So the question was, "Be aware of the times it is easy for you to be respectful and the times it is not."

What is your thinking in each of those situations?

-First class, it was more or less, I was still angry at my ex.

I was like, "Why do I got to be here?

There's plenty of other people that have done worse."

-So, Anthony, we're gonna start up top.

You can go and unmute yourself.

-I would say, really hard to, I guess, show respect when I'm getting disrespected.

And it's real easy when somebody makes it easy to, you know, just talk and show their respect.

So you start showing respect, I guess.

-They say in order to get respect, you have to earn it.

Well, no one should have to earn it.

-It was about 3 sessions in.

We were talking about property being destroyed and showing dominance that way.

And once I realized that was me, it changed my way of thinking.

And maybe I am an abuser.

-Emotional abuse -- It's more verbal.

"I may not be hitting her, I may not be slapping her, but I am doing XYZ," which is just as bad.

You make the choice to be violent, just as you make the choice not to be violent.

And respect is the same thing.

We choose to be respectful.

-I was just like, "Maybe I don't want to be that angry guy anymore."

Eventually, I didn't realize there was a change.

It just happened.

-So can anybody give me some examples of what emotional abuse may be?

-It's changed everything I think about in a relationship.

-Uh, cussing at her.

Cussing at her could be one.

-Mm-hmm.

Definitely.

-Telling her she's not doing a good job when she's at the house just to make her mad, just telling her that everything she's doing, you don't really appreciate it just to get on her bad side just because she made you on her bad side.

-Okay.

Absolutely.

Okay, yeah.

-There's a big change from when you start.

It's like, "Oh, why do I need this class?"

to now, "I need this class because it's helped me realize my wrongs and my rights."

-While this was great and it was important that we address the abuse committed by men, I realize that victims here locally were not able to access the services that they needed.

And so we started expanding gradually at Texoma Alliance to Stop Abuse into providing more services for victims.

And in 2018, we received a grant for a domestic-violence high-risk team through the Texas Council on Family Violence.

We have to have prosecutors working with police and advocates to set up a system where we are there pushing services on victims because we can't just say that it's all up to them when they're in this horrible moment of their life to pull themselves up by their bootstraps.

It's up to us to go to them and see how we can help them.

-You know, we're very fortunate in this area that we have a district attorney and we have a law enforcement that take it very seriously.

Our goals are always the same -- hold offenders accountable and get services to victims so that they can have, you know, a better life.

So I was considering that we would do some EMDR today.

So I want you to be thinking about which trauma you want to target.

-I see him choking me and... his eyes looked black.

And he spits in my face... ...and then stands up and starts stomping my stomach.

-What does it say about you?

How does it make you feel about yourself?

-It makes me mad that I let myself be weak.

-Okay.

Let yourself just see the images.

Let your brain go where it goes.

Let your body feel what it feels.

Don't judge it.

I'd like you to bring up that image -- that image of Michael on your chest choking you.

And I want you to repeat that negative cognition.

I want you to follow my fingers.

EMDR stands for eye movement desensitization and reprocessing.

It uses left brain, right brain.

It is similar to REM sleep.

It basically tells the brain to process the trauma.

Take a deep breath.

[ Inhales deeply ] What do you see now?

-I don't feel the pressure on my throat.

-Notice that.

Take a deep breath.

-[ Breathes deeply ] -What are you noticing now?

-That that's when I realized that he really didn't love me.

♪♪ ♪♪ -Take a deep breath.

-[ Breathes deeply ] -Tell me what you're noticing.

-That I don't have that fear of my parents finding me dead.

♪♪ -We don't want anybody to have to be afraid if they do decide to leave.

One of the scariest times is when they leave.

They don't know where the offender is, they don't know what he's thinking.

Are they still in jail?

Have they bonded out?

We help them with those things, with safety plans and getting protective orders and help them to feel safe.

♪♪ [ Telephone rings ] -This is a strangulation case.

They were separated, but emergency protective order was put in place.

He violated that protective order.

The police were called back over to his house and there was another allegation on her part of strangulation.

So she's definitely a high-risk victim, and we need to get with her as soon as we can.

-We'll let you know.

-Thank you.

-Mm-hmm.

So will you be the one to knock on the door and everything?

-Yeah, I'll go knock on the door.

I want to make sure that she's getting accurate information about what is happening with this case and what our roles are, and that we're there to protect her in any way that we can.

-Your destination will be on the right.

-Looks like we found it.

Hey, there, how are you?

Pleasure to meet you.

We just wanted to reach out to you, and I'm sorry it hadn't been before now.

Rachel is an advocate, and she is strictly here for you.

-My sole purpose is to be an advocate for you and to kind of let you know a little bit about my knowledge of family violence and abuse and kind of what I see from my perspective.

-Let me get a card for you, and I'll let you talk to Rachel.

I'll be right out here.

-I did read the first police report, and so, you know, I did see that you were having trouble breathing.

And did you vomit the first time?

-Yeah.

-Okay.

The fact that he has strangled you tells me that you are at high risk of fatality.

-Hello.

Yeah, she -- she doesn't deny, you know, anything that happened.

She's -- she's trying to self blame and say that, you know, this was her fault.

And I said, "Well, what did he say to you immediately after this?"

"Well, he said that, 'I could have [bleep] killed you.'"

-I am very scared for you.

You mentioned earlier about intent and not thinking he had one.

In both incidents, you were trying to leave.

-Uh-huh.

-Okay?

When a victim is leaving a situation, that is when it is most dangerous.

And that also tells me that it was calculated.

-Yeah.

Well, I'm pretty sure she said that her friend was gonna bring her.

Alright.

See you.

-You absolutely did not deserve that.

We do offer free counseling.

What I want to do is let you know about services to hopefully help ensure your ongoing safety.

And again, you have my number, so look forward to talking with you in the future.

Bye-bye.

Bye, little cutie pie.

-Say bye-bye.

-Bye.

-And she wants to be the tough, in-control person.

-And there's just no way in a conversation to work through all that.

-Yeah, I know.

-You know, so you kind of have to meet them where they're at.

And also, I don't know how much trust is there.

You know, just because of our...response, you know, in her eyes, it's kind of late.

-Yeah.

-And that's kind of what she told me at the end is this would have been helpful the first incident, and maybe there wouldn't have been a second one, so it kind of makes me feel a little -- a little bit as if I failed her in a sense, you know?

♪♪ -Never miss.

♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪ Put those in the closet so we have more space.

Why are you painting the closet?

Is it for...a baby?

-No.

-It's not for a baby?

-No.

-It's not for a baby.

-The closet's not for the baby.

The closet's for the adults.

And like end credits, got to go real slow with it.

These classes affect my life now more than ever because they're gonna teach me how to teach my children.

I'm pretty sure they'll be better people because of it.

-[ Laughing ] ♪♪ -I feel like I could be happy again because my last relationship ended badly and I feel like I can finally move on and be a better person than I was before.

-Morning, buddy.

How are you doing, huh?

-Good.

-Did you have a good sleep?

We hope to see those kids that are growing up in a home now where their father's been put into batters intervention, and he's changed and he's not abusing their mother.

And those kids are gonna realize abuse is not normal.

And when they get older, they're not gonna be abusive.

It's a lot of work to create systems in your community that can address the problem more systemically.

The payoff is down the line, but it's absolutely critical that we start now.

Because every day that we delay is going to lead to more domestic violence in the future.

♪♪ ♪♪ ♪♪